if coffee was a supository, i'd spend the rest of my life bent over. - melissa

i had a fling once. or was it a thong? - liz (maybe schelly)

men would have a perect body if there wasn't a thing between their legs. - deb m

i don't like gerbils. - julie

tongue lashes! - julie

she's from canada. what do you want? - julie

i've got to go to the bathroom. are we done yet? - xena

let's just say that if i die tomorrow, i will have lived. - julie

i am woman-ready. - julie

i just wanna lie back and watch the carnage unfold. - liz

this is sally's food and doorknobs. - jake

i give up my picks and Amy gets the cookies. that's democracy for ya. - Emily Saliers

i'd like to hire someone to stand next to me and nod while i babble about my daily problems. - liz

whatcha doin'? - amy ray
oh, i'm just gonna go get a guitar. - emily saliers

well, why the hell not? i'm stalkable. - liz

i can't believe christians made me late for work. - liz

show of hands - how many of you have your periods? - bren

is everyone still dangling their participles? - liz's mom

oops sorry.. just stepped on my dog's head. - julie

you can't pee into a mr coffee and get tasters choice. - dana carvey

if you want the butter, it's under my face. - marge simpson

ohmigawd. tori's turning into a faerie. - liz

it's true i am lazy, yes.. but i am noble! - janine garafalo

we interrupt this broadcasting to bring you loud static. - south park

i have a large growth in my abdomen! - melanie

you have to be smarter than the door. - dani

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